Blame it on someone else?

Posted: April 14, 2015 in Mental Health

I like to read, obviously if you want to write you have to have read and I qualify on that front from year dot, in fact its the only thing I can truly remember about me as a child is my love of reading. If you do read a lot there is always the chance you’ll come across things you don’t like or agree with but that’s part of the reason I read many things so I wasn’t to bothered when I received a magazine as part of my birthday package, I wouldn’t have chosen it but can see why my wife did, its a science kind of thing with pedia at the end to make it sound officially clever.

There wasn’t anything overtly about Mental health so the possibility of triggers was low but like anything its always where you least expect it that the bastards catch you. There is a section at the back that is about WW2 and contained information of the US plan if D Day failed, (nuke Germany apparently) and some stuff about the CIA and top Nazi war criminals which were very interesting. A third article was about whether Hitler really intended winning the war and if the Russian campaign had been a self flagellation of his own army, a twisted version of self harm if that doesn’t sound like an oxymoron I don’t know what does.

Anyway there were a number of leading psychiatric folks who had looked at the fuhrer and come up with theories about why or if this was true and one of their basis for this was his posthumously diagnosed Borderline personality disorder, yeah I know what a shocker. I have heard all the pseudo facts around famous people from history who have been diagnoses, Princess Diana, Marylin Monroe and Tennessee Williams to name a few but Hitler was a new one on me and I can see why he hadn’t been mentioned prior to this as he doesn’t quite fit the aspirational model they are selling us of who we can become, I certainly don’t see him as a role model although I know a few dweebs who would have loved him to be.

The explanation of how they came to this conclusion was the bit that threw me really, it mentioned PTSD but claimed that his abusive upbringing added to his behaviours as a young man pointed to PD because and I am para phrasing here “His willingness to blame everything on others no matter what” which is our main problem by our I mean BPD sufferers of course not me and Hitler. I tutted as I read this and carried on reading but I was drawn back to that statement about BPD sufferers being unwilling to take blame for anything seeking others to lay it on all the time as a bit rich really, well out and out fucking insulting to be quite honest but you get the idea I’m sure.

I had to think about this for a while as I am prone to jumping into attack or defence mode without a great deal of contemplation but on this one I felt defensive was the least I should feel. I  know so many people, far too many in fact who have a PD and I don’t know anyone who is laying the blame for everything elsewhere, some of them have gripes about things that seem trite and maybe they are mistaken but to say they look for blame everywhere else but themselves is ludicrous. This is a client group (clinical term) that suffer from serious bouts of self harm, where suicide is seen a very likely prognosis (clinical term again) and where the self esteem is generally so low that they are unable to access therapy until they have been coaxed into a position where they believe they are worth working on. I am not saying that the Narcissistic amongst us don’t have an issue with blame and the people with dependence issues probably do so to lay any chance of blame away from themselves but to state categorically that BPD sufferers are known to seek to blame everything on others is insulting.

If you understand the causes of a personality disorder, and by this I mean the abuse and neglect suffered by the vast majority of those diagnosed then laying blame elsewhere doesn’t even make sense. I know many women who believe to their core that they are to blame for the horrors wrought upon them, men who feel that as males they could have prevented the violence or abuse even though they were children at the time, none of them are easily imagined as people who seek to blame their ills on others and if we were looking for accuracy in averages the opposite would have to be true. So how does this claim even get oxygen amongst the worthies and luminaries of the mental health world? The simple answer is ignorance with a not insignificant amount of arrogance from people who seem to believe that if they cant understand us then they will have to brand us as untreatable and our laments are simply us seeking to blame someone else for our “bad” behaviours.

Hitler, on looking at his history may well have had a PD and there is a hint of a possibility it could have been instrumental in some of his behaviours but to characterise him as typical of PD sufferers is even more perverse than doing the same to Germanic people based on their shared heritage with the tyrannical little man and if you did that it would be quite rightly classified as racist.

  1. Mandi says:

    Yup… I first started learning about this after several freaking CRAZY comments on my blog. One being that I personally am just like Hitler due to the fact that I’ve been diagnosed with BPD. I made the mistake of looking around online and DUDE, the crazy (there’s a handful) of random people who have commented on a few of my posts are NOT alone.

    I haven’t written for about 6mo, I’ve stopped talking about having BPD pretty much altogether. It’s not always worth it because of all the misconceptions. One small example… My husband’s (now forced retired) doctor found out that I have BPD and his chart notes are mainly about how difficult my husband has it to have to deal with such a difficult person (I never met him).

    If there’s blame, I’ll take it. I logically know that I am not to blame in many cases, but I still have the nagging feeling that it IS my fault. That constant guilt is my biggest hindrance to healing. I’m sure that there are people diagnosed with BPD who blame stuff on others. There’s a LOT of symptoms and combinations of!

    Anyhow… the things I’ve been told about those with BPD are INSANE. One time a guy said I should just form a group for flesh eating child rapist, since that’s pretty much what we (those with BPD) are. You are correct, there are a LOT of ignorant people out there. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

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