Inception, head officially screwed now

Posted: October 29, 2011 in Uncategorized

Ive seen the film before, its a modern classic, effects and shit, if youve seen it you’ll understand if not then you really should give it a try. the trouble is I forgot a very serious point about watching this film and thats the head fuck it gave me. It was Leonardo de caprios month to screw with me, I saw Shutter Island then a few weeks later Inception and both of them did my head in for similar reasons and that can be summedf up in a single sentence, Mental Illness.

The trouble with fantastical films or rather the good thing for most people is the fact they are soo beyond the realms of possibility that you can escape into another world and enjoy them, but notif youre not really sure what the world your living in is really about before hand. Watching this evening and trying to explain it to the wife I got it, and appreciated the complexity as well as the effects but I also forgot how I connected with the idea of an alternate world where you could some day wake up and be good again, when I saw it I really wanted to have this happen for me and my mind wandered into its fantasy realm where I’m able to control shit and make things better, leaving iot made things feel worse than ever, after the lords mayors show type of thing I guess, and all this on the coat tails of Shutter Island which is about psychosis and delusion which were very near to my heart at the time.

My problem is straight forward enough, was I right then or am I now and who gets to judge this kind of thing, my perceptions change daily and whsat I believe to be true now can often be seen to be crazy in hindsight and then it all tidys itself up again and I am more confused than ever. Seeing the film again awoke some strange ideas in my psyche and to be honest it has set me back a bit, at least in my head if not in reality which isnt what I expected when I put the DVD on, as you can imagine. now where do I go? I guess Im going to have to deal with it and try and remember this is reality as it is now, there may be another one or two going on at the same time but I only get toi exist in the one I’m in at the time, so if you see me acting strange remember its my mental illness and I may just be in a different reallity.

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Comments
  1. nacadie says:

    Do i ever know what you mean. I call it my out of body experience or confused reality anxiety. I do not even want to see this movie as i know it will fuck up my head majorly and confuse my already confusing reality. I have a blog too if ever you want to check it out i put alot of stuff, tools and techniques and info am learing in my therapy and some of it really helps. I would suggest if you are interested to read them and perhaps read the ones called life skils part 1,2, 3, and 4 but mostly the mindfulness one for when i have this type of anxiety helps me alot. Also the list of distracting things or things that will bring me back down to my comfortable reality. naclivingwithbpd.blogspot.com

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