BPD or not BPD that is the question

Posted: June 13, 2011 in Mental Health
Tags: , , ,

BPD stands for borderline personality disorder, a strange set of words that are used to describe a state of being for some unfortunate people, usually those who have suffered some trauma at an early time in their lives but not exculsively. The symptoms are varied, with black and white thinking, which is the inclination to see things as one thing or another, no variable exist in this thinking and leads to paranoia and depression. There are many different types of the disorder, Histrionic, Schitzotypal and shcizoid being very common although the sufferer usually has a combination of these. The reason for me stating this set of “facts” is because it is apparent that the world of mental health is far from united on this subject, although it exists elsewhere being known as Emotionaly Unstable disorder it is a highy controversial matter with dissetations and medical reports disagreeing on whether this actually exists.

The problem I have at the moment is one of identity, both with my illness and myself, if I dont have BPD, which I am assured by some very emminent people I do have, then what have I got, does the name change but the problem still exist or is it another thing entirely that we havent been diagnosed with yet? I get that we have a broad spectrum of behaviour, there isnt a classic BPD sufferer, we all display different levels of the components of the disorder, some are self harmers others manic depressives some are both, its about as broad as it is long so I understand the retisence of those who wish to prove we have all got something different and BPD is too big an umbrella to cover these complaints, but surely the important thing is we get a diagnosis and that brings us the treatment appropriate, which is yet again another bone of contention, with Psychotherapy very much the commonly held view as regards treatment although there are other systems such as cognitive behavioural therapy and the masterson technique which all claim to do the job whilst none claims to be 100% successful.

While all this discussion and acrimony continues the sufferers are still going down like skittles, suicides are not uncommon and the world stand idly by judging us as attention seekers and crack pots, a burden on the system with no real prospects of being a useful member of society. I know many people who have come through treatment and gone on to give something back, not all of them I agree but its not as easy as doing a year in therapy then walking into employment, for a start we have the stigma of mental illness to overcome just to get the job, a big whole in your CV isnt easy to fill, creative use of words can use up some of the time but if we have to be honest and thats the only way to be in this situation we are likely to put off potential employers before they’ve even met us, the Disability at Work Act is supposed to prevent this but its just words and mean nothing in the real world. once we get to the interview stage we have our extreme anxiety issue to contend with, it may sound stupid but the pressure can be unbearable for some so what chance have they got. You do get a job against all the odds then you have to deal with the implied pressures of such a thing, getting out of the house everyday, onto public transport etc, you dont want to be unreliable and ruin your future CV with short term employment over and over again.

Its tough having this thing, whatever you want to call it and the least we should expect is a concerted effort from the powers that be, whether they are emminent psychiatrists or government policy makers, to help us get better then get on with our lives to the best of our abilities. Of all the people I have met with this diagnosis very few have been idlers, most have tried again and again to fit in and do a job, only a few have wanted to remain on benefits and they were memorable for their difference to the rest of us. In the end I dont know what will become of me, or my friends with the condition but I know we will put in the effort our end and just ask that we are met halfway by those that can help us. If in the meantime they discover a new name for this condition or a completely different diagnosis then all well and good as long as they work on the solution as hard as they have worked to prove the problem.

  1. […] BPD or not BPD that is the question (stevegoldsack.wordpress.com) […]

  2. showard76 says:

    Hi, I also have a diagnosis of BPD and struggle to accept if this is the whole story. I have been off work since April during my latest crisis (which has actually been ongoing since early 2009) and I am struggling with the idea of going back to work, but know if I don’t go back getting any other job in the future will be much harder. I would just like to be ‘normal’ but that isn’t going to happen, the best I can hope for (if I ever actually get any ‘medical’ help) is to learn to ‘cope’ with myself… 😦

    • bigsteveg says:

      Hi Sharon, all I can say is its the first step in a long chain, once you have a diagnosis you can try and access treatment which is usually over subscribed and difficult to find, I was lucky, if you can call it that in that I am living near to a very specialised unit and after a long wait got into the program and now I am on the way back up, dont let them leave you hanging, demand some treatment, I know we can be marginalised because of our behaviour but you need to either get someone on your side or if you can do it yourself. be strong and try to remember its not all that you are its just something you have, if I can be of any assistance feel free to come back here and message me,

      • showard76 says:

        Thanks Steve, I am ‘awaiting’ help but NHS waiting lists are long and I’ve even seen someone privately which hasn’t proved any more useful – yet. I will keep pushing as I know I need help to manage this! 🙂

  3. […] BPD or not BPD that is the question (stevegoldsack.wordpress.com) […]

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